Girldrive » Mid-Week Memo

Veronica will be on Feminist Wednesday (today!)

Nona — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 14:41:51 +0000

The radio show I co-host on a weekly basis, Feminist Wednesday on Vocalo, will have the pleasure of chatting with Girldrive interviewee and CFW Impact awardee Veronica Arreola today from 1 to 2 p.m. CST. On tap: feminist parenting, on which Veronica is an expert, and women in science, which just got some airtime in the New York Times.

As always, Feminist Wednesday is interactive, so listen on 89.5 FM or stream at Vocalo.org, then call with your comments: (888) 635-1112.

Mid-Week Memo: The Abortion Debate

Nona — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 18:33:00 +0000

Last month, when we visited Fargo and spoke with three women who worked for the only abortion clinic in North Dakota, the presidential elections had not yet been decided. One of the central issues defining the cultural war–and the difference between a McCain and an Obama administration–is the issue of choice. The women who worked at Red River Women’s Clinic told us that the topic is especially sensitive in the Dakotas; although there is a strong pro-choice voice, much of North and South Dakota is vehemently pro-life. Billboards like the one below (just west of Sioux Falls) weren’t unusual to spot on the side of the road.

We checked back in with two of these ladies and asked them their predictions and hopes for a pro-choice, Obama presidency. They both seemed excited and hopeful.

Becca told us:
“It would be more than fair to say that all of our staff (and probably a majority of our patients) are glad to see our choice more secure with Obama as president. I have always been proud to work at the RRWC and being connected to our community, but it is frustrating to see legislation, ND, and our country move towards conservative values that leaves women with an unwanted pregnancies and people in other situations without control over their lives. Obama gives a me peace that we have a leader that I can trust and be excited about.”

In response to our questions, Dena sent us a copy of a newsletter article she wrote regarding the election outcome. Here is an excerpt from her piece:

“Many of us woke up elated November 5th and for those of us who are pro-choice, a huge factor for our bright Wednesday morning was that our nation elected a pro-choice president. We elected a man who unabashedly stated ‘A woman’s ability to decide how many children to have and when, without interference from the government, is one of the most fundamental rights we possess. It is not just an issue of choice, but equality and opportunity for all women.’…Obama is also a strong supporter of comprehensive sex education and government funding of family
planning…The citizens in the United States spoke loudly and clearly with the election of a pro-choice president and the defeat of anti-choice legislation in two states. With these positive changes now is the time to keep that momentum going.”

Read the rest of Dena’s article here.

Mid-Week Memo: Nuns, Sex, and Contraception

Nona — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 03:06:00 +0000

Note: This is Part 2 in a 3-part series discussing Chastity, Purity, and Promiscuity.

Last week we met up with Katharine (below), a 23-year-old resident of Forest Park, IL, studying to be a librarian and working at a couple non-profits downtown. She also has another possible title in her future: nun. She has resolved to either fall in love with a man and devote herself to a family, or become a nun and devote herself to God and those who need help. Katharine, at first glance, does not fit any chaste stereotypes, coming across as a perfectly normal, stylish, cool twentysomething. She even told us she thought that a nun is “the ultimate feminist. They are looking at the world and saying, ‘Listen, you want to care about what your clothes look like? I don’t care. You want to care about making money? I don’t make any money! You want to cast down those who are burdened? I want to pick them up.’ She has given up her entire life, her clothes, her cool shoes, just so that she can help people who don’t have help. That’s really empowering.”

But she also voiced some very strong opinions about sex and what it should mean in a woman’s life. Emma, in a conversation about waiting to have sex until marriage, asked Katharine: “Is it ever okay for a woman to have sex just…because?” Katharine answered:

“My view here is to look at a person’s entirety. So, a person isn’t simply a body, or a brain, or a soul–all of these things make up an entire person and to be separate one or all of these things would be using the other person. In the case of sex, it is the use of his or her body. To an extent it is saying, “I’d love to have fun with you, but I don’t want to deal with your emotions or well being after that. You’re not a person–just an object, just a body.” Or, in the case of couples using contraception, “I want all of you…except your fertility. We can just throw that part out of the mix for now.” But, even in a case where love is deeply involved, contraception still eliminates an aspect of the woman’s whole being–fertility is written into our genetics and we can’t deny it.”

Our interview with Katharine was one of our best, yet another reminder that a feminist can come in many forms, one who doesn’t fit the strict parameters pop culture assigns to her.

Mid-Week Memo: Women and Rock

Nona — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 01:14:00 +0000

In Philadelphia, we caught up with Emily, 26, right, who is the lead singer of Philly-based electro-pop outfit Pony Pants. She is the server of gelato by day, rock star by night, feminist all the time. She had some thoughts about women in music:

“I put a lot of energy and thought into performances, and I have rarely had anyone imply that it’s bullshit because I am a woman. There have been a couple of guys that come up to us after a show and will be just gushing about all the guitar riffages, and the gear, and the amps, and I’ll be like…didn’t you like the singing? And they say, “not really my thing.”

“Generally what happens more is that girls come up to me and want to hug and talk about their projects and it’s fucking amazing. They will express that they really admire me, stuff I would have never expected. I figured people were over it. I see bands with girls in them all the time, in every capacity, and I love it. Sometimes when we’re on tour we get paired with bands just because they have girls in them, which is cool and I don’t mind at all, but guys in the audience will more frequently be like “Come on, you’re not even in tune,” which is so stupid. I have the biggest soft spot for bands with girls, even if they are bad. It’s the whole Riot Grrrl, cult of amateurism stuff. Bands that are like “we don’t know how to play, but we are just going to fucking do it, because it feels good.”

Mid Week Memo: RYAN AND NATHAN

Nona — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 21:25:00 +0000

In the early stages of Girldrive, we were reminded of a group of people that feminism sometimes glosses over: the transgender community. On our recent trip to the East coast (during New York’s Pride Week), we talked with a genderbending woman and a transman who is currently passing at the workplace. This is what they had to say:Ryan (left) is 26, born and raised in Queens, works at a real estate office, has been training for the last 2 years to be a firefighter. She identifies as genderqueer, and changed her name to Ryan earlier this year because she “never felt comfortable with [her] given name.”

“Sometimes I feel more identified as female, and other times I feel more identified as male, depending on my situation. But then I start to think, ‘It’s based on the situations I’m in only because I’m thinking in terms of the definitions I’ve been taught.’ I’m assigning language to behavior, but it seems kind of unnatural to me…I feel like the world is really in a struggle of borders, which have become the metaphor of my life. There’s a struggle to cross borders and to keep things out. Confronting this will be important for feminism, I think, but more generally for just figuring out how to co-exist in the world.”

Nathan is 22, lives and grew up in Philly, quit college last year, works for a pharmaceutical software company.

“I don’t think that my decision to transition [into a man] makes me any less of a feminist, because the reason I transitioned is unrelated. My understanding of feminism is for both sexes to be equal–in ability, capacity, rights, everything. I can’t say that switching really takes away from that. And I feel like I can make a difference from the inside…because now I am thought of as a man with other men. I don’t pull out a whiteboard and write, ‘Here’s how not to objectify your wife.’ But I do express feminist ideals covertly and I think it helps when guys hear it coming from guys.”

Mid-Week Memo: Words from the Guys

Nona — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 01:16:00 +0000

detail from painting by Emma’s mother, Susan Bee, titled “Girly Man,”
and the cover for a book by Emma’s father of the same name

This week, we collected a few quotes from men on the topic of feminism–are they feminists, and what does feminism mean to them?

“I feel like men and women both need to be uplifted from where they’re at, and in our society, women are more marginalized. So in the same way that I might be more aware of people that are poverty-stricken, or minorities that have had a harder experience in our country, I’d say I’m a feminist in the way that I’m aware that women are often subordinated in our society, or underappreciated. But I don’t think you can uplift just women without changing the way that men approach it as well. The balance is very important, and it’s a two-way conversation.”
–Aaron, 26, production assistant and freestyle MC in New York

“I think I’m a feminist, but that doesn’t mean that misogynist qualities aren’t ingrained in me. I think that’s true for women, too. I think I respect and am sensitive to women’s issues, but I still find myself expecting women to act a certain way. I still say stuff like, “That chick is hot.” I am feminist to the extent that I question how things exist now, but I’m still very much a product of mainstream ‘guy’ culture, whether I like it or not.”
–Aaron, 27, waiter and writer in Chicago

“I am not sure how to answer the question of whether or not I consider myself to be a feminist. Of course, feminism means different things to different people, but it doesn’t mean much to me. Do I respect people regardless of their gender? I would say yes — at least I try to. If someone demonstrates themselves as worthy of respect, their gender really doesn’t matter to me. However, I have a very different opinion of people who allow or choose to have the question of their gender (woman, man, trans, whatever) play too great a role in defining themselves.” Matt took his thoughts in a more philosophical direction after this, wondering whether gender distinctions themselves create unbalanced power structures. He wondered: should we look past gender to find some mythical sexless human essence, or is there some merit to be found in embracing hierarchal structures? Click here to read his musings in his own words.
–Matt, 24, paralegal in Chicago

Mid-Week Memo: JADINE

Nona — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 20:26:00 +0000

This is Part III of a series dedicated to
Contemporary Art & Feminism

Last Saturday Nona and I had the pleasure of attending a graduate student symposium curated by Woman Made Gallery in honor of the Feminist Art Project. We sat through hours of presentations, with paper topics ranging from 1970’s confessional video art, to the use of string and embroidery to represent femininity in visual practice, to the repercussions of the “L-Word” on lesbian stereotyping in the media. It was the first time I have been to such an intimate gathering of art history and feminism nerds, and not been the youngest member of the audience. Most of the gals presenting and listening (unfortunately there were few men in attendance) are daughters of the third wave, yet there was a sense of scholarship and dedication to second wave artists that should serve as a placating reminder to intergenerational worry worts.

The youngest panelist was my college friend Jadine, 23, (above, middle) who now works for Woman Made Gallery. She presented her brilliant thesis on the performance artist Orlan (which I workshopped on when we were fellow art history students). Jadine also was one of our first interviewees, back in April 2007. We caught up with her after the conference to see how her opinions on art and feminism have developed over the past year:

“Interning at Woman Made gallery has changed my viewpoint a lot. It’s easy theoretically for me to feel like that there is no need to essentialize female identity, that females that are doing good work should just emerge. But, I’m seeing that in the everyday market reality there is a need to assert an essentialist identity of women to just get them equal opportunities to display their work.”

Last weekend Jadine and I were both in attendance at a panel discussion on “post-black” artists, put on by the Renaissance Society museum. The structure of the post-black argument echoed that of contemporary post-feminist artists, women artists who don’t want their gender mapped onto their artworks. How this plays out when race and gender intersect was, astoundingly, never brought up. I asked Jadine: Can you be a post-black, post-feminist artist?

“Somehow art made by women has a lot more fudge room then art by black artists. Everyone doesn’t expect female artists to make art about feminist issues, but it seems very hard for a black female artist to make art that’s not read in terms of race.”

jadine, april 2007

–EBB

Mid-Week Memo: McCain Madness

Nona — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 21:23:00 +0000

In the last few days, a disturbing phenomenon has caught our attention: incensed Hillary supporters are pledging their support for McCain, refusing to jump on the Obama wagon. Collier, 23, (left) one of our childhood friends and a lady who’s never afraid to speak her mind, is our personal political consultant and political-blog expert. She had some choice things to say:

“I don’t think it’s fair to say that this largely white and older block of women are being hysterical and irrational–necessarily. However, I do think that older, white women feel like they were owed something, that it was their time to shine. And this was a huge blow to their collective ego, that somehow a younger, swifter (maybe too swift) black man took their moment. But these same women were the ones who by and large support the right to choose. These are the same women who believe that every American deserves access to affordable health care. And they would be doing a disservice to Hillary Clinton (their presidential hopeful) and all of the work she did surrounding the preservation of a woman’s right to choose and healthcare if they voted for McCain.

They are not hysterical but they want to be heard. This is their way of being heard. It’s an empty threat. They will come to their senses, both because Hillary Clinton will remind them of McCain’s increasingly conservative anti-choice record. He used to believe in abortions for rape victims and victims of incest but since he needs to bring in those uber-conservative voters, he has denounced all abortion. They will come to their senses because they themselves will remember all that they struggled for. I don’t think this is something that upstanding feminists should be concerned about. If white women do stay home or vote for McCain, it’s because they’re insane.”

Mid-Week Memo: The Virgin

Nona — Thu, 29 May 2008 02:01:00 +0000

Note: This is Part 1 in a 3-part series discussing Chastity, Purity, and Promiscuity.

The other day, Rosa,* 16, confessed to us that she had been raped when she was 9 by a family friend. “I’m fine now,” she told us. Her voice wavered but her strength and poise was obvious. She seemed to have accepted what had happened and moved on. But our hearts broke when when she shared how it’s affected the way she looks at love and sex:

“[My boyfriend now] knows what I’ve been through, and he don’t even kiss me. We’ll hold hands and he’ll ask me if it’s okay. I met him at church. There was a time where I came out to the church, because they were like, “Come up to the altar if you need healing because you’ve been raped or molested.” So I went up there and he started praying for me…and I finally was able to give my problem to God. I really struggled with forgiveness, but now that I’ve started to go to church, I’ve forgiven the man who raped me. It was wrong, it was a mistake he did, but in God’s eyes, I’m still a virgin, I’m still pure.”

Our stomachs sank, not only because Rosa had been hurt, or because she was only a child when it happened, but because she fundamentally felt stained by the rape. No matter how she had let her life blossom, the most important thing to restore after she was raped was her “purity”–her virginity. Now that Rosa had gotten a second chance at guarding her sexuality, she barely lets her boyfriend touch her. On some level, she was admitting that she will forever think of sex as something to defend herself against, not to enjoy.

The reason for this dread is partly psychological–no 9-year-old is ready for sex, much less outright violation. But the social construct of virginity and purity is also so ingrained in our culture that who can blame Rosa for feeling impure and dirty? Why are we so fascinated by this tiny little piece of skin that, up until a few decades ago, was usually not even up to a woman to “give up”? Virginity is still a huge deal. Virginal pop stars are alternately idolized and scorned. “Virginity pledges” in the shadow of abstinence-only education are on the rise. Teenage girls constantly fret about what makes you “technically a virgin” (see Shechter’s movie trailers, below). Not to mention that the whole idea of virginity is based on heterosexual relationships, leaving an entire population of homosexual women and men out of the equation.

Most unfairly, people couldn’t care less about teenage boys losing their virginities. Guarding sexuality is almost purely, so to speak, on the shoulders of a woman, implying that the only one who would even want to have sex is unquestionably the man. Rape will always be unthinkably painful, but it could be a lot easier to heal from it as a young girl without the added job of “gatekeeper.”

Emma and I have been obsessed with the topic of virginity ever since this road trip began. Emma is sinking her teeth into Hanne Blank’s Virgin: The Untouched History, and I’ve been patiently waiting for Therese Shechter’s documentary The American Virgin (her website is where I stole that cherry photo). Shechter calls virginity “the cornerstone of Western civilization.” It’s a term that’s only started to be questioned and broken down, and pop culture has a long way to go before they quit dichotomizing Madonna and whore.

*name has been changed

Discussion Question 1

Discussion Question 2

UPDATE: Mid-Week Memo

Nona — Wed, 14 May 2008 23:22:00 +0000

Wednesday entries will now cover specific topics and projects that we are involved in. Look out for ongoing themes such as women and the arts, mentoring teenage girls, intergenerational conversations, and more juicy tidbits from the feminist frontier.

Left Forum: Continuing the Conversation

In March, I got invited to speak on behalf of “young feminists” at the Left Forum, an annual conference of lefty intellectuals, activists, writers, and organizers held at Cooper Union in New York. The panel was called “The Pleasure Frontier: An Intergenerational Dialogue on Sex in Feminism” and consisted of me (in the middle); Jennifer Baumgardner (right), the thirtysomething Third Wave feminist activist, author and filmmaker; and Loretta Ross (left), Second Wave-era feminist and founder of the National Coordinator of the SisterSong Women of Color Reproductive Health Collective. The room at Cooper Union was packed–people sitting on the floor and in windowsills, latecomers hanging in the doorways. The brief panel was followed by–I’m not kidding–a 1.5 hour-long question and answer session.

Anger and confessions spilled out of people’s mouths, as arguments bounced across the room. Hands shot up everywhere: Can stripping and porn ever be feminist? Why is incest ignored by the media? Are women of color too oversexualized to be included in the feminist conversation? Jennifer, Loretta and I felt a palpable generational gap. There were audible “tsks” in reaction to what I had to say about teenage sex and modesty. I could feel the tension, rage, and passion in this tiny little classroom, and I left with a strange mix of defeat and satisfaction.

It proved to me that once again, feminists are their own worst enemies. It seems to take unfathomable amounts of compromise to please women from all over the spectrum. But it also showed me that feminism–sex-related or not–is still a hot topic. It is one that women care about and want to tackle head-on. People (yes, men too) get riled up about these issues. Sex was just a way to get the fire going, but judging by the profusion of hugs and thanks yous I got after the panel, it will continue to burn.

-NWA

*Look out for the next installment of Emma’s Contemporary Art and Feminism series next Wednesday.